Ok, precursor to the title. Joel and I are fine. Amazing, actually. So this has nothing to do with us, and everything to do with me. And yes, we've discussed.
The military lifestyle, for me at least, is...different. Some people mesh very well with it. They live on post and love it, always attend the family support meetings (the Army calls it an FRG, I am not sure what the Air Force calls it). They love moving, getting new orders, and seem to make insta friends wherever they go. This is not me.
And I don't mean to sound like I am bashing this breed of military wife. I envy it, actually. It takes me a while to find my groove in a new place. I would never live on base, unless forced. I don't like the military to envelope my life. I love that my husband feels joy in what he does. But what he does and what I do are two different things. I need the separation from the base. Minus the time spent overseas, we rarely shop on base, and when Joel gets off of work, the uniform gets taken off and I feel like I can return to my "normal" life.
And I HATE moving. See previous post about my lack of a career happening, but I hate resigning from one job to search for another, make another house a home, all to realize that I have to do it all again in 2-3 years. I hate leaving old and amazing friends, and it is hard for me to put myself out there to make new ones. I hate that one of the first questions I am asked is "what rank is your husband?" I hate deployments and TDYs. I hear all the time "thank God he's leaving for a week" but I loathe away time from my hubby. I hate when he gets called in or stays late for nonsense that only the military can make up.
A lot of rambling just to say while some spouses thrive in this kind of lifestyle, I have yet to find my groove in it. Luckily I seem to have met at least one person here that makes me feel normal and myself, and doesn't define me by my husband, what he does, or what his rank is. I am trying my best to be open, and will of course continue to support and love my husband to my greatest ability, but I hope that someday I grow more fond of what this lifestyle has to offer. And if anyone has any friendly advice, it is always welcome.